Monday, September 10, 2012

Revenge

some days it gets messed up
i don't remember having mood swings these bad
i don't remember last night
i don't remember the good times we had

i think i'm crazy
cause sometimes,
i cannot seem to control what i feel

the shaking
trying to stop the tears from falling
i cannot

because at times like these
i don't know why i still wish
it only makes it hurt worse
it only make it less bearable

nobody bothers to understand anymore
the way things are turning out,
i'm heading for some sort of breakdown
i'm speeding toward it
and i don't even know why

i don't even remember how to let it out anymore
i don't even remember what it's like anymore
to have someone understand you
like a mother understands their child

i don't even understand anymore
i don't even try to anymore


i'm now in the ocean
i don't struggle to stay afloat,
because i'm drowning
the oxygen slowly escaping me
my lungs burning,
burning for some air to breathe

i'm crying,
but the waves slowly fights them off my cheek
they dissolve into the sea
because it is salt water as it is

i don't know why i still wish
but i do
and when i do,
i am thankful
that at least i had been able to experience it



*


and knowing that God, You still love me no matter how annoying,
how literally crazy,
how dramatic,
and how stupid i get.
You still love me, and i am amazed by You.

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